Gone down with a freaking cold - going on previous experience, training is impossible when you can't breathe so won't be going till it's gone! :(

Ruddy combinations.....

Not posted for a while. Been up to my eyes in work, car breaking down and so on - you know, the usual. Haven't missed any training but the last three sessions we've been doing a lot of "combinations" which is exactly what it says really.
For example, in "line bashing"* a particular punch, followed by another type of punch, followed by a kick, followed by a different kick, and ending with a couple of the earlier punches - all in one action....for me, very hard and I have to say not my favourite part of training.
You have to REALLY focus on what you're doing and at the same time ensure that the technique and delivery of the punches and kicks are as strong as if you were actually fighting someone. Thirty minutes of this is very very tiring and I personally sweat buckets.
For some reason if I get even slightly distracted and spot someone out the corner of my doing it not quite right, I end up copying them and losing all orientation, what stance I'm in, whether I should be throwing a kick or a punch, facing in the wrong stances-I get in a right state.
I've found lately that I'm in line with a young lady whose stance in these combos aren't very long. So we when we've turned round (Mwatte) and I'm following her, I'm almost kicking her up the arse or punching her and then I have to shuffle backwards to give her a bit of a head start. Bless her.
Anyway, that's all for now, we have training tonight and at the moment I have a sore throat, a bit achey and feel like shite.....all I can think is sodding swine flu!


*"Line bashing" is my own term for when the "karateka" are all in a line across the dojo and, under the sensei's command we move forward, carrying out these combinations, basics etc otherwise known as "kihon".

Trained tonight, and looked forward to it all day. However.......when I got to the dojo and started warming up I felt I had no energy for it.
We did some line bashing and Shodan kata as it must be that sensei thinks we are all shit at it. I certainly felt shit at it - no strength in my punches or kicks, knife hands - it was all crap basically.
The last half of the session was spent doing Shote bunkai which is very effective in taking out an opponent if pulled off properly.
I think the guy I paired up with was a bit fed up with my not able to use the right hands to launch an attack - I think basically my mind was not on the job.

Roll on Monday night.........or not.

Reasonably good session last night apart from my bloody trousers wanting to descend all the time. Now that the weight is coming off at a huge rate my Gi is now too big round the waste! Nice problem to have but I need to sort it out by Thursday. Nothing more likely to get your kicks at half mast than the feeling you are about to lose your kecks in front of the ladies!

Towards the end did my first public display of Sandan. Ok doing it slowly but trying to do it at full speed and I'm conciously thinking what comes next. Still, early days yet - never learned Nidan and Shodan as quick as this one so we should be ok. Had some corrections by our sensei on some positioning of arms and legs. Just hope I remember what they were next time.

It is easier to move having lost about a stone in weight over the last month and we did a lot of line work combinations which normally I would be gasping afterwards but very pleased with the progress so far.

Was wandering around Iain Abernethy's excellent website earlier and was amused to read that one of his friends or contributors, not sure which, believed that a kick to the head was about as much use as a punch to the shin.

Not certain that I go along with that as I was at a competition last year watching some male seniors. One of them decides to execute a spinning kick and caught his opponents temple which sent him crashing in a heap to the floor. It was a good five minutes before he was able to get off the stretcher after being carried off by the meds.......

I can see what he means though as in a street situation there will be more time to do a disabling knee stamp than an arty farty Jackie Chan manoeuvre!

I had a spinny roundy kick done on me once by a black belt a couple of years ago in sparring - not a terribly good one I might add and I managed to duck under the kick which disoriented me a bit and while I was down there I punched him in the bollocks much to his disgust (and mine).

Well, no I didn't go to the kata course yesterday - not because I didn't want to, I had my Gi on all ready.....it was the Mrs who said did I really need to go and train in this heat, when there is quite a long time to the next grading at Christmas. I have Sandan all mapped out now and already know it quite well. Obviously, technically it needs work which is where the kata course is useful to iron out any bad habits or incorrect form creeping in. As the aforementioned "Mrs" is already a 2nd Kyu (Brown belt, two stripes) and has already shown me a fair bit of kata techniques in the past, I agreed with her - stayed home and did garden DIY instead.

Usually after a weekend of DIY and karate my back is hanging and usually miss Monday night's training session. At the moment my back feels fine so should be up for some training tomorrow.

Tomorrow is Saturday and we have a "kata course" where I try and learn bloody Sandan. I hate it - looks so gay........shall I go? Find out in tomorrow's exciting epis(yaaaawwwwwn)ode!

So yesterday's post was a bit of a rush coz I wrote it ages ago back when I first started. I had intended for my sensei to put it on the club's website but that was over a year ago and it still hasn't appeared on it.

So here it is.......all I'm trying to do with this is try and convince "golden oldies" that when you get to the end of your forties you don't have to start thinking about dieing. No sir. I am not going to do old. I am fifty next year and like to think that (now....) I'm in pretty good shape - still a bit chubbier than I would like but I'm on my way to my ideal size. Notice, I use the word size as when doing this intense form of activity, weight is irelevant due to muscle mass. I believe for every half pound of fat loss, you gain a pound of muscle or something like that.....so then it's easy to see why the scales don't seem to move when you're combining a diet with intense exercise.

Since then I've graduated from red to white to yellow and more recently earned my orange belt, which was nice. Next belt is green so they are starting to get dull in colour. Hopefully if I can master Sandan and a few other things I should be ready to grade again at Christmas 2009.

Beginners Eye View to Karate

With conflicting emotions I received the news that our local Karate Club was to start a beginner’s class at the Dojo and (at the time) decided that this would be an excellent idea.

Me being the lazy arse of the family that didn’t do karate training, I watched with interest and pride as my wife and two daughters progressed through the years and achieved their belts. The opportunity to start training never really presented itself for me due to my other commitments, working, just starting self employment and so on – all sorts of excuses really. I also noted, on my rare appearances to watch at the dojo, that beginners did tend to struggle with, what is commonly known as the basic “line work” or “kihon” and it seemed to be a while before they actually realised what was going on; seeming to be pretty much left to their own devices. This is probably not true at all and doing a huge injustice to the instructors, but that’s how it seemed to me and when I imagined myself “up there” trying to give it some - punching, kicking, blocking, all in some kind of bizarre order, I’m thinking, “not for me thanks”.

However, a dedicated beginner’s class? Now that sounded interesting………..

Being well into my forties, and not a spring chicken anymore, more of a sprung turkey, I was aware that age was not exactly on my side with the somewhat sobering realisation that there were more years behind me than in front. An obvious question then, would my body hack it? After all, my back was shot away after years of hoisting boilers on the wall by myself in my plumbing and heating installer days. Even my knees scream blue murder from too much crouching and kneeling down. Don’t forget this was from the old days when it was fun to do things and nobody had ever heard of Health and Safety before (It was called something else then, “Common Sense”). For instance, if someone fell down a hole on a building site, everyone would say “fool, should look where he’s going”. Nowadays of course we sue the person who dug the hole. I even wore trainers when working on construction sites!
Yes indeed, Mr Health and Safety would have had several small litters by now if he knew the antics we got up to in the good old days. Hence the relative freedom to lift boilers on walls without any help, breathe in asbestos, set fire to apprentices, build gas fired weapons, blow things up and all sorts of fun things.

Anyway, digressing a lot, and back to karate, I was totally unfit in the athletic way, and I don’t really think lying on ones back, under a car, in a cold garage trying to lift a gearbox into position, with the bell housing resting on my chin and the gearchange extension on my nether regions, really constituted a good workout. There was also the issue of carrying around a few more pounds weight than I really needed but hopefully starting training would make me shed that. My theory was that if I was not gaining any weight with my present diet and not really exercising, then doing karate might make me lose it, right? Nope, doesn’t work like that……

Then of course is the thing where you get to the point in your life where it becomes harder to grasp and retain new information. It’s hard enough to hear the information and let it stay in your head, but when you have to get the old body to perform a manoeuvre based on what you’ve just been shown or heard…oh dear.

Another thing bothered me and that was my hearing. It has been said in the past that I don’t hear things well. Certain tones within the spoken word I just don’t pick up, so sometimes I hear something different to what has actually been said and then respond accordingly. Now, obviously this can have either hilarious or tragic consequences depending on what I think I’ve heard and what I’m doing at the time. As an example, someone saying “your kitten looks cuddly” can become “your kitten looks deadly” if conditions aren’t spot on. You get the idea………. (just in case you’re wondering whether the “kitten” is a metaphor, it’s not).

So, if anyone reading this knows me and has had the misfortune to come away from any of our conversations confused or upset or both, then I must apologise. Also if you’ve spoken to me and I seem to have ignored you, I apologise again but I’ve either not heard or thought you were talking to someone else! Please persevere – I’m not that ignorant, honest! As far as karate goes then, would I be able to hear the commands? Especially when my back was towards the instructor?

The only way to find out all these things was to give it a go. So, this was a perfect opportunity to get off the backside and do something. Or was it?

Around June 2007 was to be the date of the first class and already there had been a flurry of interest by some mums and dads, some of whose offspring were already training in the existing full senior and junior classes.

As the day approached I thought of the time back in 1983 when I first went to sign up for karate training at a local sports centre. I didn’t make it. On entering the building, there was a long flight of stairs leading down directly to the reception area. I entered the building through the doors in the all glass façade and proceeded to descend the aforementioned stairs. To this day, I’ve no idea why, but I fell from the top to the bottom and ended, upside down on my back looking at all the upside down people waiting in the queue at the reception.

And they were looking at me.

As I led on the stairs, for what seemed like a hundred years, and my whole form began to glow from the embarrassment of it all, I had time to digest the myriad of faces, each in a torment of his or her own emotions as they reflected on the spectacle unfolding before them. “Was he hurt? “Should we help? Will he join the queue? Will he leave? Will he say anything at all?”.

I was. They didn’t. I didn’t. I did. I didn’t……….

At that point, karate couldn’t have been further from my thoughts as I staggered to my feet and rushed back up the stairs, two or three at a time, towards the exit, knocking over the “Slippery Floor” sign, tripping over the last few steps on the way just to add insult and also raise a few more chuckles from the queue behind me at the bottom of the stairs.

Sounds daft to say but that’s probably the reason I don’t hold a black belt today. Just think, if it had happened today I could have sued them for having stairs.

Anyway, our first training session at the Club came and went and before getting to the dojo, no injuries befell me. I didn’t fall down any stairs nor get run over by a bus and I must say my nerves were getting the better of me before I arrived. I’ve always heard it said that the first session is always the worst as you have no idea what is going on or why, when to bow, where to stand, all the mysteries of the Japanese language, the various traditions, all a complete mystery to the fledgling martial artist.

The subject of traditions within karate is always a topic of amusement to the uninformed. People often wonder why it is that all the instructions are given in Japanese or why bow to the dojo or to your sparring or kumite opponent and so on. When people ask me I have no clue how to answer except to say that this is the way it has always been done. It’s traditional you see. I asked someone the same question many years ago who was fairly well into karate and he put the whole thing into perspective. His view being that, would the Japanese rugby team shout instructions to each other on the pitch in pidgin English? Then after the match, maybe down twelve pints of lager followed by a couple of curries each and a team vomit or pee out into the streets. I personally didn’t think so…….

As has always been the case, everyone, from black belt downwards warm up in the main hall, with around ten minutes sprinting from one end to the other and to their credit the “seasoned veterans” who were already established, did their best to avoid crashing into the new red belts as we ran around like lunatics trying to look like we knew how to run at least!

After that came some stretching exercises which are an essential part of the training if you’re to avoid hurting yourself while performing karate techniques. These stretching routines develop muscle and joint flexibility which help you contort your poor old body into some impossible looking stances especially when kicking. Even after all the running, which I’d not done so much of since I don’t know when, and the stretching, I felt a lot worse at that point than when I got into the dojo at the beginning……The prospects for the rest of the session were not looking good. Not helping much either was the heat.

Being as this was the start of the summer the temperature was already around meltdown as we followed our sensei for the session, into one of the back rooms at the dojo, well out of the way of the proper training session. Our instructor for the session is one of the Club’s senior instructors, a Fifth Dan black belt, international kumite referee and as it transpired has the patience of a saint.

We lined up in the room, similar to how you would against a firing squad and were taught how to stand before the sensei (sensei is Japan speak for “one who has gone before” otherwise, instructor) in musubi stance, bowing and then into the “ready” stance which is “Yoi” in Japanese and looks like you’re holding an imaginary steering wheel. He then described the first move known as “junzuki” which is a front lunge punch after stepping forward. What followed was a blur of stepping forward and punching while bringing the other arm back tight to the hip, stepping forward again then swapping the punch. A lot easier to do than describe but doing it properly is even harder. Everyone seemed to get the hang of it fairly well and I have to say once on the move and engrossed in what we were doing, it became quite enjoyable (not exactly the word I’m looking for but I know what I mean). For a while, and in the sessions to follow, I had some problems turning round, where the back leg steps over then you pivot on that point until facing the opposite way – a typical example of my brain and my body being way out of touch with each other. After a while we added some front kicks into the steps (kette junzuki) and this was where I realised the benefits of stretching properly and also being a bit fitter, as one of my hamstrings tried to make a bid for freedom on several occasions.

Then all too soon, the session was over and I felt exhilarated that I’d made it through the hardest part which was actually turn up and have a go. Surely the rest would be plain sailing. Wrong!

Since I started I’ve tried to attend training as often as possible and I think apart from holidays and a couple of silly little injuries, I’ve done just that. Some new red belts have come and gone, but most have at stuck it. We’ve also had a go at a couple of kata which is a whole different ball game to the line work. The best way I can describe a kata is as a recognised series of combined solo moves, which relate to a real fighting situation – the complexity of the performed kata depends on the grade of the student.

When instructors have not been able to attend and there’s been no one available to take the beginners class, we’ve joined in the main group and initially were amazed at the pace of the higher grades. We simply couldn’t keep up in the line work and felt embarrassed and daft falling around all over the place. We’ve learned since that this is part and parcel of the learning process. All the higher grades have been there before us falling about all over the place at some point – and from what I’ve seen, still do!

We seem to have dabbled in a huge amount of different things in a short space of time but in reality have only just scratched the surface. Karate is very much a personal journey towards the higher grades and better things and how well you do is entirely up to you. How much effort you put in is entirely up to you. Obviously, if you don’t put in any effort you might as well take up sewing as there’s little point in doing it. When I go training, I’ll always have a red face afterwards. As much as I am able I will always give 100% of what I’m capable of. I’d like to resort to the worn out cliché and say I will give 110%, but that’s plain silly - I’m not ready to die just yet……..


Being a Japanese martial art, it’s a self defence system which has evolved and diversified over the last century into different styles and sub-styles. Some people do it just for the Kata. Some people do it for Kumite (combat). Some are happy to perform in both. Some people do it for fitness or give confidence in one’s ability to “look after oneself” in street situations. As for me I’m not sure yet - I’m definitely interested in traditional karate history and how it became what it is today. I do have to get fitter for sure because then it will allow a better performance in whatever part of the training I’m doing and perhaps I won’t hurt so much the next day after training. Maybe I should have got fit before starting, but I know in my heart I would NEVER get round to getting fit without something to take my mind off the monotony of exercising. I’ve tried all sorts in the past. Static cycling and all I want to do is slit my wrists, I did a few years of playing squash which for me now would be suicidal, running just hurts and bores the hell out of me…….the list is endless.

Socially the get togethers, parties, barbecues etc. are excellent, and a great way to relax and get to know everyone. Annually the club organises Christmas parties, Fun Days, regional and national competitions if you want to compete. A karate activity course is organised and is usually held in spring in a tropical paradise over a weekend. Ok it’s held in North Devon at a caravan park, not very tropical I know, but if you stay for a week, come rain or shine, there’s plenty of the aforementioned “social get togethers” where I’ve been told it’s sometimes not possible to remember the previous day……..make of that what you will!

Twice a year in June or July and around Christmas, is grading time when you’re assessed for your next belt level. This is where you have a chance to show the club instructors how well you’ve trained and learnt the basics and the kata relative to the belt you’re hoping to achieve. You get marks out of ten for each technique. It’s quite a long and drawn out affair especially when students take their Dan grades as these assessments can be nearly two hours long.

In 2007 the Club organised two major competitive events in the South West which were hailed as huge successes. The club has members who compete in Europe and have been highly successful in the past and also nationally in various parts of the UK.

So as a major player in karate circles, we are a large club and has something for everyone; young or old, fit or unfit, fat or thin, male or female, experienced or inexperienced. I read of an old chap somewhere in the UK last week who was eighty years old and just gained his First Dan.

The Club’s four main Senior instructors all have many, many years of experience between them and knowing the little I know about karate, I’m very glad to be taught by such capable people. For little return they put their heart and soul into running the club, devoting hours of their spare time to stand before us, drilling the same things over and over again, week after week and we students still manage to get it wrong.

My only regret about karate? If only I hadn’t fallen down those stairs……